Any thought you have that limits your ability to be, do and have what you want in life is a limiting belief. You have many beliefs in your 'rule book for life'. Some support you and move you forward in life, others limit you and hold you back from accomplishing your goals.

How did you get limiting beliefs? You created them! Mommy, Daddy, the teacher or the bully on the playground did not give them to you. No one can give you a belief. You have to create or adopt it all on your own.

You created and took on beliefs when you were very young. These beliefs helped you understand and cope with your environment. A Mother's well-intended advice of "Don't talk to strangers" became "People I don't know will harm me" in your book of life rules. A teacher may have corrected you in front of the class and you took that to mean "I'm not smart enough." A bully said "Don't be a cry baby" and you interpreted that to mean "mature people shouldn't show emotion."

That's the thing about beliefs. They are based on a young child's interpretation, usually misinterpretation of any event. And as a child, you were doing the best you could. And to continue to do the best you could do, you obeyed the rules! The voice within that reminded you of the rules to follow in order to stay safe is of your Inner Critic. He will warn you if you're in danger. Public speaking is feared because of the rule "People I don't know will harm me." You won't allow yourself to consider big opportunities because "I'm not smart enough." You won't be able to fully express how you feel with a significant other because "Adults shouldn't show emotion."

This well-meaning yet misguided Inner Critic follows you everywhere chatting away in your subconscious at every twist and turn in your life's journey. You profoundly rely on its advice to avoid pain, what can cause you harm, emotionally and physically. You think that this misguided voice is you. It is not you! It is just trying to protect you.

You've heard or felt your own voice in occasion. It was that gut instinct, that clear calm voice that spoke a wisdom that your Inner Critic Found Excuses And Reasons (F.E.A.R.) to ignore. This innermost intuitive voice knows your truth, knows your passion and, if listened to, will always guide you as you turn your dreams into reality. This clear confident wisdom within is who you are.

---

Most Common Unconscious Thoughts:

---

"I'm not (good, worthy, smart, rich, young, etc.) enough."

A page from your past keeps haunting you. This is the story you tell about yourself over and over again that defines who you think you are. It is keeping you from being at peace with yourself.

If this story limits you in any way then know this is an Inner Critic tale to keep you safe right where you are. "Oh, no! Moving on to bigger and better opportunities is just too scary! Pull back!" he warns. This page from your past isn't real anyway. It's just a story about what you think you saw, felt or heard during an event in your life. It is the misinterpreted experience, not the truth.

---

"You (or you) should be, do or have (fill in the blank)."

You believe that someone should do this or that so you can be at peace. And you resent that they haven't done it yet. Maybe if you resent them enough, the resentment will make them do it.

People often live their lives inside of other people's expectations and what they expect of others. A lot of time is spent should-ing on other people. And a lot of time is spent should-ing on your self. This restrictive behavior is akin to beating up on yourself and others. And it feels awful. Any moment you spend beating up on anyone or anything is a moment wasted. Spend your time focusing on what you want rather than what you resent. You are not empowered to mindfully create what you want in life if you are spending your life in resentment and punishment.

---

"I thought I'd be (fill in the blank) by now."

There is something that needs to happen in your life before you can be at peace (happy, fulfilled, etc.) You resent that it hasn't happened yet. Your think that your resentment will finally make it happen.

With your resentment your focus is on the lack of it instead of the experience itself. When your focus is on lack you create more experiences of lack. Turn your focus to what you want. Place your full attention and energy on the outcome you wish to experience. Resistance melts away and what you want comes into your experience.

---

"This is not supposed to happen this way."

Something is happening now that should not be happening and it is preventing me from being at peace now. There's that 'should' word again.

People and events aren't meeting your expectations. You want others to live within your expectations. Let go of your attachment to how things must happen or what others should or should not do. Such rules are very restrictive.

If what you want to experience happens in a way you never thought of would you take it? Of course you would! Why place limitations on how it can happen with 'shoulds'. Allow your life to flow unrestricted and surely you will find happiness and contentment. Whatever is happening is bound to happen and you cannot stop it. Stop should-ing all over yourself! Open yourself up to what's possible and what's possible will be delivered to you.

What's really bothering you when you feel this way is remorse over living others people's expectations. So you throw expectations back at them. It's a battle that no one wins.

---

"They did this to me."

Something happened in the past that should not have happened, and you resent that. If that hadn't happened, you would be at peace.

You feel something you did or somebody else did is the cause for your unhappiness. This is a victim mentality. It is saying that other people have the power over your life experience. Whatever 'they' did is an event. The event isn't preventing you from being at peace. Only you can prevent yourself from being at peace by attaching meanings to those events. And you probably misinterpreted the event in the first place.

For example, "My Mother always said I never do anything right. It's her fault I never pursued my dream of becoming a rocket scientist. Now here I am stuck in this rut of a job doing something I hate instead of being a Nobel Prize winner."

Truth is, even if your Mother often said you never did anything right she didn't always say you never did anything right. Parents do the best they can. They don't get out of bed in the morning and think of ways to screw up their children's lives. Furthermore, who agreed with your Mother? You did! Instead of acknowledging the things you do right, or well, you only focused on what you did wrong. You did a lot of things right! Change your story! You can spend your days unhappy or be at peace at this very moment. It's your choice.

---

"I can't be happy until (fill in the blank)"

You place restrictions or commitments or yourself and others. You can't be respected until you have your MBA. You can't be happy until you have a loving relationship. You can't be successful until you've earned a million dollars. A person isn't worthy until they have proven their friendship to you.

You can be respected, happy, successful and trusting in this very moment. Choose to respect yourself, be happy with who you are, enjoy the success that you have already achieved and value others as you would value yourself. Choose to be all that now. Why wait? Waiting allows you to remain right where you are, in your comfort zone. You may not like the zone you're in but it's what you know and it's safe.

Limiting beliefs are a part of you. That's ok. You will never completely get rid of limiting beliefs. Just bring them out from your subconscious to your conscious so you are mindfully aware when that Inner Critic voice presents itself. Disarm the belief by taking away it's power over you. Chose beliefs and thought patterns that support your desires. You are here to express your full potential. This is your gift to yourself and the world. Let go of the baggage that holds you back so you can experience your rich delicious life!

---

Next: The Magical Flow Approach to Creativity

---

Copyright ©2009 Valery Satterwhite. All rights reserved.

---